December 30, 2010

out in the open

i keep writing and deleting posts. for the last few months, each time i've written on here i've had at least 1 prior draft. the reason i keep deleting them and starting over with random nonsense is because the subject i keep going back to is my mom. i keep deleting them because they seem so negative and i don't want this to be a 'poor me' blog. but, since my mom has ever so prominently been on my mind since she walked out on us on july 28...i may as well just get it out in the open.

andrew and i both got texts on that wednesday afternoon from her. they said that she loved us and wanted to talk later. when i got off of work that text was followed by a phone call from my dad saying that my mom, all her things, erika, all her things, and the dog were gone. gone. all that my mother left for my dad (other than his things and the furniture) was her wedding dress and a note that said 'i can no longer live with you. i've taken erika. don't try to call or text us. leigh'

the next five days were spent with the rest of us trying to get a hold of erika (my mom had taken away her phone) or my grandparents (who said they didn't know any details but haven't talked to us since she left). five days later, erika was returned home. my mom had taken erika on what she said was a 'fun girls roadtrip.' it wasn't until they were 2 days in that my mom said that she was leaving my dad and not ever going back...which is when i got a call from a hysterical sister & we were able to figure out that they were driving to northern wisconsin.

since then my dad has been served with papers, and she wants nothing to do with the rest of us. now here's where i fight my urge to try and salvage this sad post into something more peppy, or at least nonsensical. but i'm not going to. not this time. there has been too much pain over these last 22 weeks/almost 6 months that i don't think needs to be hidden. of course there are more details, but then this would turn into a novel instead of a post.

i can see that this is a huge reason why we are here. i can't imagine not being by my family while all this was going on. it's been such a roller coaster that we're all going to have to deal with for awhile.

you'd think that after your parents have been married for 26 years she would have had the decency to at least tell him that she wasn't happy and that she wants to go live her little party life on her own. let's just say that i'm learning a lot more 'this is what not to do' things from her than you probably should from your mother.

there. it's out.

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